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How To Pick The Best Mattress Online
Episode 1
Stay Tuned For More Episodes
Here it is! There's nothing worse than a sag-prone, foam-only mattress. That's why I got a Sleeping Duck Mach II. But do the Indestruct Springs really make the Mach II sag proof? I put it up against a 15 tonne steamroller to see for myself.
Oh....I just read on the SLEEPING DUCK website that the springs aren't just about sagging. Here's a cool video about their INDESTRUCT SPRINGS and the MOTHERBOARD ZONING inside.
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How do I know your steamroller test isn’t fake? You could have used fancy CG and cutaways to make it look like it rolled over the mattress?Don’t worry, it’s all real. And here’s a link to the mattress being rolled over with no cutaways. My mate Greg filmed it on his iPhone. (Insert link)
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If this mattress is as good as you say it is, how come it doesn’t cost 10 thousand dollars?"That’s the thing, it should! A sleeping Duck mattress is direct to you. No crazy retail markups. No phoney sales deals. It is the real deal. Awesome quality mattress at the right price. Fantastic spring support so your mattress never sags. Simple as that.
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If I bought an online foam only mattress and not a Sleeping Duck would I ever be able to be your friend?Hmmm, that’s tough. To be honest, I don’t know if it would work out between us. I’d be forever reminding you that your foam only mattress feels great now, but wait six months when it starts to sag. Wait for it to become a back killer. I’d be hassling you non-stop to ditch it and buy a Sleeping Duck straight away…wait, hang on, in that case maybe we can be friends!
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I just bought a Sleeping Duck mattress…Congratulations! It’s the best purchased you’ve…
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I haven’t finished the question yet.Oh, sorry, go on.
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Thank you. Now where was I?You bought a Sleeping Duck…
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Oh yeah. I just bought a Sleeping Duck mattress. So what if you can roll over it with a 15 tonne roller? What do I care. I only weigh 65 kilos. I’m never going to break any springs.Because Sleeping Duck springs are made from twice tempered steel, they’re indestructible. That means your mattress won’t sag like those foam only mattresses WHICH will sag after a while even if you do weigh 65 kilos.
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I recently got kidnapped by aliens and probed in ways I cannot describe here. But I’m pretty certain the aliens had a Sleeping Duck mattress. Is this possible? Do you deliver to outer space? I’m thinking of travelling to other planets soon so would be good know.Um…
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If I buy a Sleeping Duck mattress today will I win Megamillion’s Powerball next Tuesday?Yes. (I just got off the phone to my lawyer and she says I can’t say that. Thing is, I don’t have a lawyer, so I’m not sure who I just spoke to. Might have been my mum now that I think about it. Anyway, for legal reasons I have to say no but personally I have a reeeeallllly good feeling about you winning Powerball. Imagine how many Sleeping Ducks you could buy if you did win!? But let me just add the chances of you winning Powerball are 1 : 292,201,338 and the chances of you having an amazing nights sleep on a Sleeping Duck is in my opinion 1:1. That’s 100% guaranteed. And heck, Sleeping Duck give you a 100 night trial anyway! It’s a win win!)
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I recently went on a date. We got on really well, had a couple more dates but now the person isn’t returning my calls. I think they’re ghosting me. What should I do Lawerence? Should I roll over them with that 15 tonne roller you used?"Not a good idea. You’ve seen what it does to watermelons. Sounds like you need to treat yourself to something special. Something really comfortable. Something of great value but incredible quality. Something with indestruct springs…hmmm, I wonder what that could be?
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Lawrence, this is your wife Sarah. Can you pick up some bread on the way home?"I’m at the shops now, they’ve run out of that wholemeal sourdough you like. Should I just buy another Sleeping Duck mattress instead and run some more tests?
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What? How did you make that connection? Lawrence! You’re buying another Sleeping Duck aren’t you…Sorry honey, you’re breaking up I can’t read your writing…
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Does the mattress come in medium rare?I think you’re referring to firmness. I hope. You can have soft, medium, firm, extra firm. Just check out the Sleeping Duck website….
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A friend of mine went to the doctor and was given six months to live. He couldn’t afford to pay the bill, so the doctor gave him another six months."Hahahahahahahahaha
Frequently Asked Questions
Frequently Asked Questions
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How do I know your steamroller test isn’t fake? You could have used fancy CG and cutaways to make it look like it rolled over the mattress?Don’t worry, it’s all real. And here’s a link to the mattress being rolled over with no cutaways. My mate Greg filmed it on his iPhone. (Insert link)
-
If this mattress is as good as you say it is, how come it doesn’t cost 10 thousand dollars?"That’s the thing, it should! A sleeping Duck mattress is direct to you. No crazy retail markups. No phoney sales deals. It is the real deal. Awesome quality mattress at the right price. Fantastic spring support so your mattress never sags. Simple as that.
-
If I bought an online foam only mattress and not a Sleeping Duck would I ever be able to be your friend?Hmmm, that’s tough. To be honest, I don’t know if it would work out between us. I’d be forever reminding you that your foam only mattress feels great now, but wait six months when it starts to sag. Wait for it to become a back killer. I’d be hassling you non-stop to ditch it and buy a Sleeping Duck straight away…wait, hang on, in that case maybe we can be friends!
-
I just bought a Sleeping Duck mattress…Congratulations! It’s the best purchased you’ve…
-
I haven’t finished the question yet.Oh, sorry, go on.
-
Thank you. Now where was I?You bought a Sleeping Duck…
-
Oh yeah. I just bought a Sleeping Duck mattress. So what if you can roll over it with a 15 tonne roller? What do I care. I only weigh 65 kilos. I’m never going to break any springs.Because Sleeping Duck springs are made from twice tempered steel, they’re indestructible. That means your mattress won’t sag like those foam only mattresses WHICH will sag after a while even if you do weigh 65 kilos.
-
I recently got kidnapped by aliens and probed in ways I cannot describe here. But I’m pretty certain the aliens had a Sleeping Duck mattress. Is this possible? Do you deliver to outer space? I’m thinking of travelling to other planets soon so would be good know.Um…
-
If I buy a Sleeping Duck mattress today will I win Megamillion’s Powerball next Tuesday?Yes. (I just got off the phone to my lawyer and she says I can’t say that. Thing is, I don’t have a lawyer, so I’m not sure who I just spoke to. Might have been my mum now that I think about it. Anyway, for legal reasons I have to say no but personally I have a reeeeallllly good feeling about you winning Powerball. Imagine how many Sleeping Ducks you could buy if you did win!? But let me just add the chances of you winning Powerball are 1 : 292,201,338 and the chances of you having an amazing nights sleep on a Sleeping Duck is in my opinion 1:1. That’s 100% guaranteed. And heck, Sleeping Duck give you a 100 night trial anyway! It’s a win win!)
-
I recently went on a date. We got on really well, had a couple more dates but now the person isn’t returning my calls. I think they’re ghosting me. What should I do Lawerence? Should I roll over them with that 15 tonne roller you used?"Not a good idea. You’ve seen what it does to watermelons. Sounds like you need to treat yourself to something special. Something really comfortable. Something of great value but incredible quality. Something with indestruct springs…hmmm, I wonder what that could be?
-
Lawrence, this is your wife Sarah. Can you pick up some bread on the way home?"I’m at the shops now, they’ve run out of that wholemeal sourdough you like. Should I just buy another Sleeping Duck mattress instead and run some more tests?
-
What? How did you make that connection? Lawrence! You’re buying another Sleeping Duck aren’t you…Sorry honey, you’re breaking up I can’t read your writing…
-
Does the mattress come in medium rare?I think you’re referring to firmness. I hope. You can have soft, medium, firm, extra firm. Just check out the Sleeping Duck website….
-
A friend of mine went to the doctor and was given six months to live. He couldn’t afford to pay the bill, so the doctor gave him another six months."Hahahahahahahahaha
Infrequently Asked Questions
-
How do I know your steamroller test isn’t fake? You could have used fancy CG and cutaways to make it look like it rolled over the mattress?Don’t worry, it’s all real. And here’s a link to the mattress being rolled over with no cutaways. My mate Greg filmed it on his iPhone. (Insert link)
-
If this mattress is as good as you say it is, how come it doesn’t cost 10 thousand dollars?"That’s the thing, it should! A sleeping Duck mattress is direct to you. No crazy retail markups. No phoney sales deals. It is the real deal. Awesome quality mattress at the right price. Fantastic spring support so your mattress never sags. Simple as that.
-
If I bought an online foam only mattress and not a Sleeping Duck would I ever be able to be your friend?Hmmm, that’s tough. To be honest, I don’t know if it would work out between us. I’d be forever reminding you that your foam only mattress feels great now, but wait six months when it starts to sag. Wait for it to become a back killer. I’d be hassling you non-stop to ditch it and buy a Sleeping Duck straight away…wait, hang on, in that case maybe we can be friends!
-
I just bought a Sleeping Duck mattress…Congratulations! It’s the best purchased you’ve…
-
I haven’t finished the question yet.Oh, sorry, go on.
-
Thank you. Now where was I?You bought a Sleeping Duck…
-
Oh yeah. I just bought a Sleeping Duck mattress. So what if you can roll over it with a 15 tonne roller? What do I care. I only weigh 65 kilos. I’m never going to break any springs.Because Sleeping Duck springs are made from twice tempered steel, they’re indestructible. That means your mattress won’t sag like those foam only mattresses WHICH will sag after a while even if you do weigh 65 kilos.
-
I recently got kidnapped by aliens and probed in ways I cannot describe here. But I’m pretty certain the aliens had a Sleeping Duck mattress. Is this possible? Do you deliver to outer space? I’m thinking of travelling to other planets soon so would be good know.Um…
-
If I buy a Sleeping Duck mattress today will I win Megamillion’s Powerball next Tuesday?Yes. (I just got off the phone to my lawyer and she says I can’t say that. Thing is, I don’t have a lawyer, so I’m not sure who I just spoke to. Might have been my mum now that I think about it. Anyway, for legal reasons I have to say no but personally I have a reeeeallllly good feeling about you winning Powerball. Imagine how many Sleeping Ducks you could buy if you did win!? But let me just add the chances of you winning Powerball are 1 : 292,201,338 and the chances of you having an amazing nights sleep on a Sleeping Duck is in my opinion 1:1. That’s 100% guaranteed. And heck, Sleeping Duck give you a 100 night trial anyway! It’s a win win!)
-
I recently went on a date. We got on really well, had a couple more dates but now the person isn’t returning my calls. I think they’re ghosting me. What should I do Lawerence? Should I roll over them with that 15 tonne roller you used?"Not a good idea. You’ve seen what it does to watermelons. Sounds like you need to treat yourself to something special. Something really comfortable. Something of great value but incredible quality. Something with indestruct springs…hmmm, I wonder what that could be?
-
Lawrence, this is your wife Sarah. Can you pick up some bread on the way home?"I’m at the shops now, they’ve run out of that wholemeal sourdough you like. Should I just buy another Sleeping Duck mattress instead and run some more tests?
-
What? How did you make that connection? Lawrence! You’re buying another Sleeping Duck aren’t you…Sorry honey, you’re breaking up I can’t read your writing…
-
Does the mattress come in medium rare?I think you’re referring to firmness. I hope. You can have soft, medium, firm, extra firm. Just check out the Sleeping Duck website….
-
A friend of mine went to the doctor and was given six months to live. He couldn’t afford to pay the bill, so the doctor gave him another six months."Hahahahahahahahaha
-
How do I know your steamroller test isn’t fake? You could have used fancy CG and cutaways to make it look like it rolled over the mattress?Don’t worry, it’s all real. And here’s a link to the mattress being rolled over with no cutaways. My mate Greg filmed it on his iPhone. (Insert link)
-
If this mattress is as good as you say it is, how come it doesn’t cost 10 thousand dollars?"That’s the thing, it should! A sleeping Duck mattress is direct to you. No crazy retail markups. No phoney sales deals. It is the real deal. Awesome quality mattress at the right price. Fantastic spring support so your mattress never sags. Simple as that.
-
If I bought an online foam only mattress and not a Sleeping Duck would I ever be able to be your friend?Hmmm, that’s tough. To be honest, I don’t know if it would work out between us. I’d be forever reminding you that your foam only mattress feels great now, but wait six months when it starts to sag. Wait for it to become a back killer. I’d be hassling you non-stop to ditch it and buy a Sleeping Duck straight away…wait, hang on, in that case maybe we can be friends!
-
I just bought a Sleeping Duck mattress…Congratulations! It’s the best purchased you’ve…
-
I haven’t finished the question yet.Oh, sorry, go on.
-
Thank you. Now where was I?You bought a Sleeping Duck…
-
Oh yeah. I just bought a Sleeping Duck mattress. So what if you can roll over it with a 15 tonne roller? What do I care. I only weigh 65 kilos. I’m never going to break any springs.Because Sleeping Duck springs are made from twice tempered steel, they’re indestructible. That means your mattress won’t sag like those foam only mattresses WHICH will sag after a while even if you do weigh 65 kilos.
-
I recently got kidnapped by aliens and probed in ways I cannot describe here. But I’m pretty certain the aliens had a Sleeping Duck mattress. Is this possible? Do you deliver to outer space? I’m thinking of travelling to other planets soon so would be good know.Um…
-
If I buy a Sleeping Duck mattress today will I win Megamillion’s Powerball next Tuesday?Yes. (I just got off the phone to my lawyer and she says I can’t say that. Thing is, I don’t have a lawyer, so I’m not sure who I just spoke to. Might have been my mum now that I think about it. Anyway, for legal reasons I have to say no but personally I have a reeeeallllly good feeling about you winning Powerball. Imagine how many Sleeping Ducks you could buy if you did win!? But let me just add the chances of you winning Powerball are 1 : 292,201,338 and the chances of you having an amazing nights sleep on a Sleeping Duck is in my opinion 1:1. That’s 100% guaranteed. And heck, Sleeping Duck give you a 100 night trial anyway! It’s a win win!)
-
I recently went on a date. We got on really well, had a couple more dates but now the person isn’t returning my calls. I think they’re ghosting me. What should I do Lawerence? Should I roll over them with that 15 tonne roller you used?"Not a good idea. You’ve seen what it does to watermelons. Sounds like you need to treat yourself to something special. Something really comfortable. Something of great value but incredible quality. Something with indestruct springs…hmmm, I wonder what that could be?
-
Lawrence, this is your wife Sarah. Can you pick up some bread on the way home?"I’m at the shops now, they’ve run out of that wholemeal sourdough you like. Should I just buy another Sleeping Duck mattress instead and run some more tests?
-
What? How did you make that connection? Lawrence! You’re buying another Sleeping Duck aren’t you…Sorry honey, you’re breaking up I can’t read your writing…
-
Does the mattress come in medium rare?I think you’re referring to firmness. I hope. You can have soft, medium, firm, extra firm. Just check out the Sleeping Duck website….
-
A friend of mine went to the doctor and was given six months to live. He couldn’t afford to pay the bill, so the doctor gave him another six months."Hahahahahahahahaha
Infrequently Asked Questions
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